I don’t know what it feels like to get butterflies from seeing someone in person that I truly care about. I used to.
Maybe that’s what happens when you train yourself to not have feelings anymore.
All I know is that I still get that ache of anticipation.
That’s better then butterflies, right?  

Everybody an their mother is in a band nowadays. 
I don’t care if you just got signed, or you tour everywhere.
It’s not impressive.
Sure you’re probably talented, but I doubt you sound any different from everyone else.
If your heart an soul is dedicated to it, so be it.
But don’t use it as some sort of “pick up line”.
I don’t give a shit.

I like boys that I can have movie night with every single night if I wanted.
Not someone who’s going to make me famous by talking about me on their Twitter.
Get real.
I want real love, not a text message conversation.  

What if I can’t be all that you need me to be
We’ve got a good thing going, we have some promises to keep
But my addiction it can be such a detriment
Please believe in this my dear, I am more than penitent

What if everything’s just the way that it will be
Could it be that I am meant to cause you all this grief
My war ships are lying off the coast of your delicate heart
And my aim is steady and true as it’s been right from the start

There’s a degree of difficulty in dealing with me
From my haunted past comes a daunting task of living through memories.
If we could just hang a mirror on the bedroom wall, stare into the past and forget it all

So when we leave it’ll be a quick midnight escape
We’ll disconnect ourselves from all of yesterday
I’ll dig for water and fashion our very own wishing well
Then we’ll throw our coins down hoping to rid of us of this little hell

There’s a degree of difficulty in dealing with me
From my haunted past comes a daunting task of living through memories.
If we could just hang a mirror on the bedroom wall, stare into the past and forget it all

Will we get out of this little hell
Will we get out of this little hell
Will we get out of this little hell
Will we get out of this little hell

If you read through my Tumblr, you would understand me in ways I could never explain.
Also another reason why I am addicted to this website.
It gives me reasons to express myself without putting it into my own words.
Need an insight on what I’m going through month to month?
Read everything I reblog.
I even read past months an remember why I posted what I did, so on an so forth.
It’s comforting; like a picture diary that everyone can read along an understand. 

Things get complicated.
People float from one heart to the next.
Souls get lost in the midst of imperfection and misinterpretations. 
Games are for the weak minded.
The sun rises and sets on different horizons.
Flutter from time zones with incredible jet lag.
Homesick for a place that doesn’t even exist.
You can’t build foundations on sand.
Guilt is a feeling you get when you feel you’ve done something wrong.
Who’s to say what’s wrong an right?
Love isn’t an item you buy an use when you’re lonely.
Sweet talk gets you satisfaction for a day.
Take nothing but pictures; leave nothing but footprints. 
Free float. 

You have no idea what far away feels like. Being nearly 30 minutes away isn’t distance at all. That’s just miles you can get on your car. You think you know what being alone feels like. You know nothing about chasing your heart around the world. You merely spend approximately 3 to 4 times a week with the person you’re most fond of. That’s not distance when you say your goodbye at night when you can’t stay because you work early in the morning. Relationships aren’t difficult when they’re right under your nose. 

You have no idea what far away feels like. 

Literally cannot stop crying my eyes out to Bon Iver. I haven’t been blogging much lately since a lot is going on in my life lately, and I just feel disconnected from everyone and everything. I can’t seem to keep my feet on the ground.

You’ll put your time and energy into someone and they’ll still disappoint you and deceive your trust continuously because they can’t let go of things that are toxic in there life. One day everything will be right. One day there will be someone on the same page.

One. Day.

All I want is someone to love me so much that they don’t know what they’d do without me. To love me that much that they’d do anything to keep me around.

Another image from my final “wasted time”.

I am incredibly grateful for the journey I am taking. I’m finally content with my goals, dreams, and relationships. I feel humble for everything I have experienced the past few years and have a feeling these next few coming years are going to make up for all the wrongs and misunderstandings in the past. I love my job, and everyone I work with. I enjoy what I’m going to school for, and continue to amaze myself with what I can create. I’m where I am today thanks to the wonderful people in my life currently. I’m back on track with my healthy routines and sleep well through the night. 

The only thing I could do without is constantly missing loved ones. Throughout my entire life I’ve always been separated by distance with family and friends. I wish I could just take everyone I love and put them all on and island so I never have to miss anyone again.

I hope you all had a wonderful Monday! xx

Flooding your dash with all these sappy adorable cuddling pictures because my cuddle monster is across the country.

It amazes me at how bitter some people can become. As if something inside of them just decided to click on and they realize they are at fault. You’re only in control of your own life, so your actions are the reason you are where you are now. No one can change your circumstances for you. When you’re stuck with feeling bitter and regretful, think of why you feel that way because it sure as hell isn’t someone else’s doing but your own. You can’t expect people to just read your mind or pick up on a gesture or comment made. Everyone needs reassurance. They need to know their actions aren’t wasted; that they’re wanted.

When you see something you like standing right in front of you; grab it.

I need to hear this everyday….